A few weeks ago I overheard two girls talking about online dating. One of the girls said that maybe this was her year to go “Online in 09”. Pause for the appropriate amount of shock, horror, outrage, pity, and/or fear. “Yeah right,” she continued “I don’t know how desperate I would have to be to date online.”
Call it desperation, call it curiosity, or call it expanding your finding pool. One way or another I confess that I have joined the underworld of online dating. I don’t take online dating very seriously but it is fun to have a little attention from the male species. With online dating you must take the good, the bad, and the ugly all in one package.
The Bad:
“My account ends Monday so I would like to go on a date with someone before I close my account I’m still debating on whether to keep trying this. Im being blunt but Im ready to have a good time and get to know you so if you would like to go on a date with me e mail at... Things don’t go well oh well, one night gone in your life but who knows we might just hit it off.”
Hmm, while this is one of the most persuasive sales pitches I have ever heard I think I will pass. As it turns out, one night of my life is a big deal.
The Ugly:
“hi im david and Im new at this i was going threw the search and seen you and wow you are prity send me a message if you want to.”
The profile picture that corresponds with this messages is exactly what you are imagining. Divorced 37 year old man with three kids looking for love. I'm not expecting a rocket scientist but a girl has got to have some standards. Don’t worry I only went out with him once and our make-out session was very g-rated.
The Very, Very, Ugly:
Before you read the next few lines I want you imagine this guy's profile picture. Picture a very good looking dark haired man staring into the camera longingly. He is wearing a red button up shirt which is conveniently unbuttoned showing a tan and rather hairy chest. You are swooning aren’t you?
First message:
"i am the man that you are waiting for :)"
No response from me.
Second Message:
“i like to get to know you...interested?"
No response from me.
Third message:
“i really have alot to share with you..could you give chance to get to know you?”
Finally I send the poor guy a thanks but no thanks message and he responds:
“ :( but , u didn't here me..u just decided without even talk to me? could u tell me why? why u always turn me down :( can we talk?”
No! No! No! NO!!! We can not talk, you are not the man I have been waiting for, and I don’t care if you have a lot to share with me you psycho online stalker. What can I say? Online dating is not for the faint of heart.
My friend used to online date and she would make all of the guys she found bring a friend and make me double with her. Needless to say, Mr. Right was never found and I had to suffer through way to many bad blind dates. But there were always plenty of Mr. Wrongs (stalkers, profile picture liars, older then they really say, etc). My advice is to say no to online in 09! ha ha
ReplyDeleteOh boy, it sounds like you have some good stories! Actually, I have only gone out with one guy I met online. It was a really fun date. The only problem with him was that he started dating someone who was not me shortly after we went out.
ReplyDeleteThis.is.AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ReplyDelete